Funny review for Brutal Planet

From metalsludge.tv

ALICE COOPER - "Brutal Planet"
by Ozzy Stillbourne

Cover: 7 Billion Dollar Babies out of 10.
The cover is dark and evil looking and you can see half of Alice's old ass face. By looking at the cover you can kind of tell this is going to be a heavy album. Works for my drunk ass.

Booklet: 8 Cooperstown's out of 10.
Not bad for a Spitfire release. There are lyrics, some spooky photos of Alice, and shit like that. It also includes a little booklet that pimps out some Kiss like merchandise, such as Alice Cooper teddy bears, chairs, pictures, and shit like that.

Songs: 8 No More Mr. Nice Guys out of 10.
I'll have to admit that the old guy can still rock. This is Alice's heaviest album to date, and unlike Kiss who tried to relive the past with "Psycho Circus," Alice came up with some new shit and it sounds current. Alice says this is somewhat of a concept album and he's trying to paint a grim picture of the world. That sounds about right but even though Alice has a message, he doesn't hit you over the head with it like some bands do. You can still sit back and drink to this album without getting bummed out. There are some really cool riffs, the drums sound heavy, and Alice still sounds like he always has. "Cold Machines" sounds a lot like "Beautiful People," and "Take It Like A Woman" is an old school Alice like ballad, or at least as close to a ballad as you'll get from Alice.

Comments: Despite being 105 years old, Alice still has some shit left in him and I'm impressed.

What do you think of that album?